Best Case/Worst Case: 2019 Oregon State Beaver Football Preview

FeaturedBest Case/Worst Case: 2019 Oregon State Beaver Football Preview

By Con/35th & Jackson

Our annual nod to the Ted Miller. Previously ESPN.

Here we will run our best case/worst case scenario for the 2019 Oregon State Football season. All very real possibilities but extreme in both cases.

PSA: Every year we think we go to the extreme… but once again, we were not EXTREME enough last year with point performances, we will try and take this to another level AGAIN… for last year’s, see here: Best/Worst Case 2018

Here’s to 2019.

Oklahoma State:

Worst: Black and orange vs black and orange. A classic tale and the first meeting between the two teams turns out to be a nightmare for the home team and fans already start to dread the return trip to Stillwater.

First play of the game, Champ Flemmings on the return gets lit up by Rodarius Williams at the 17 yard line. Williams stands over Flemmings, but from the fans eyes he stands over the turf as Flemmings vaporizes into the turf. With Trevon Bradford out and now Champ vaporized, Kolby Taylor steps in.

Luton drops back, throws a 10 yard slant to Taylor and he is off to the races. Luton being the leader and captain he is (with his new added speed from off season training) races down for a lead block via Sunshine in Remember the Titans. However, Sunshine didnt have a broken neck or ankle. Luton lowers his head and his head gets taken off by you guessed it, Rodarius Williams. Luton’s body falls to the turf and his head remains rolling at the opponents 13 yard line where Kolby Taylor trips and breaks the same leg he broke his senior year in high school. OK State picks up the fumble and houses it the other way. 7-0 Pokes, Beavs down 3 players after two plays…

Instead of Tristan Gebbia coming in for the relief of the headless Luton, Niner decides to ground and pound with QB/LB (yes I typed that combo right) Jack Colletto. The triple option ensues. Oregon State scores four straight TD’s on 45 consecutive running plays but OK State matches them with four straight TD’s on four total passing plays. Tibesar’s defense is a disaster, Colletto gets gassed playing both ways, and David Morris breaks his neck on special teams and retires from football mid third quarter. Adley Rutchman the special guest, takes a knee centerfield for his fallen fellow Sherwood Bowman.

Ok State has 20 total plays, 11 touchdowns… We lose 84-28.

Best: Black and orange vs black and orange. A classic tale and the first meeting between the two teams turns out to be a nightmare for the AWAY team and fans already start to salivating about the return trip to Stillwater. Phil books a one way flight to Stillwater for 2020 midway through the 3rd quarter. Braught says he is “in” but preemptively says he can’t get PTO that close (one year) to date…

Now to the field, orange smoke starts to rise from Reser at 7:27, OK State enters… the orange smoke is extinguished by a cloud of black smoke from the Beaver locker room… Elu Aydon emerges carrying Champ Flemmings in a backpack ala Yoda on Luke Skywalkers back… Champ throws an orange lightsaber over his head that is caught by Jemar Jefferson and ignited to show an orange glow in a cloud of black…Jefferson emerges with a Darth Vader mask on… Hamiclar Rashed, no helmet, comes out with his signature skull bandanna over his face holding a frozen carbonite encapsulation of Gary Andersen… Jefferson slashes the carbonite in two with his lightsaber and the rest of the team runs out crushing the pieces of Andersen in carbonite… 46,000 strong pack Reser and erupt as 300 Violin Orchestra (2010 intro video music) blares over the loud speakers. Jonathan Smith is shown in the intro video swinging his sword on the Cal Poly mascot… Everyone is confused and yelling “we are playing Ok State…” Loud speaker comes on and it is announced pre game that Cal Poly has cancelled their meeting with OSU during week three and Utah State has replaced them on the schedule at Reser. Scott Barnes cowers.

Now onto the action… Luton comes out firing and the offense makes Hawaii’s run and shoot look elementary with Jefferson gashing the OK State defense for chunk after chunk. Jefferson finishes with 214 yard and 3 TD’s. Luton throws 4 TD’s and the defense shines in a Big 12 route… Mike Gundy disgusted post game, shaves his mullet on the walkway to Gill locker room. Con picks up his hair as a trophy.

We win 70-31.

@ Hawaii

Worst: With OSU reeling after a blowout loss to the other OSU, Nick Rolovich plays hardball. Matthew Tago transfers to Hawaii on Thursday of game week, cites “homesick.” Niner questions on Twitter as Tago is not from Hawaii… Tweets at Nick Daschel on accident… Nick Daschel runs routine background check on Coach Smith…

With half OSU fans in attendance, Beavs get off to a quick start up 14-0 on two Arty long TD runs. With the ball and the lead, Colletto audibles and decides to abandon the triple option run game and signals for “PA Read.” Fakes to Jefferson and gets strip sacked by Matthew Tago who gained immediate eligibility with an “extreme weather” exemption, houses the fumble and does the hakka dance with Isiah Tufaga in the endzone who is also magically eligible with a newly created “homesick” waiver…

Hawaii loads the box and Colletto is forced to throw and throws five picks. Cole McDonald throws 7 TD’s and 600 yards and Tim Tibesar cries postgame shaking the hand of Mark Banker on the opposing Hawaii sideline. Banker offers to take over for his newly met friend and Tibesar accepts on the spot. Doesn’t tell Niner. Scott Barnes endorses Banker… more to come…

We lose 56-20.

Best: With part of Mike Gundy’s mullet embedded into his Hawaiian lei, Jonathan Smith trots out pre game to meet Nick Rolovich. Rolo, shirtless, brings Isiah Tufaga with him to greet Coach Smith. Addison Gumbs clocks Rolo before he meets Smith and Rolo is out cold… Mark Banker takes on head coaching duties… Brain Lindgren can’t contain himself and comes out of the box to coach on field… Pulls a Lane Kiffin and raises his hands right as Luton releases an eighty yard bomb to fresh off injury, Trevon Bradford. Bradford stiff arms Hawaii LB and front flips in the endzone. 7-0.

With Banker taking over, Tim Tibesar knows it’s his time. He gathers the OSU defense and tells them to “blitz all night.” Matthew Tago and Avery Roberts combine for 13 TFLs and 5 sacks. Hawaii has 148 yard of total offense which leads to a “sloppy coaching” comment postgame from Tim Tibesar when asked how the defense dominated Hawaii.

Banker’s defense gets exposed and Luton throws a 53 yard hail mary before halftime and OSU cruises to a 52-13 win.

Nick Rolovich gets put on probation by the NCAA for illegal player transfer portal contact and Mark Banker takes over head coaching for the rest of the season and goes 2-10. Gets promoted to head coach as Rolo is sentenced to 7 years in prison by the FBI for illegal payoffs to transfer players and NCAA backroom officials.

Cal Poly

Worst: Cal Poly’s triple option is almost too much to handle for OSU. Beavs get down 21-0, Collettos heroics tie the game up with 2 minutes left. Cal Poly drives to OSU 4 yard line, throws back shoulder fade and Jaydon Grant picks it and returns to the house as time expires avenging Jordan Poyer’s Sac State fade route…

We win 28-21.

Best: (Schedule change to Utah State)

Gary Andersen walks down the Reser ramp 4 hours before pre game… Phil shouting “big boy pants” gets escorted out by red coats for “threatening comments”

Andy takes over dressed as a blonde cheerleader and Braught as a frat house dad… wait… Gary smirks at Andy as he passes by… Darrel Garretson, the newly named offensive coordinator at Utah State, threatens to “shut up” all the OSU fans pre game… Proceeds to run QB power exclusively for the first half and finds himself in a 21-3 halftime hole… Jemar Jefferson rushes for 149 yards and a score and gets his name in the first Heisman watchlist. Isiah Hodgins snags 3 TD’s from Luton and bows to Gary on the sideline. Issac Hodgins channels his inner Gary Berteer and sacks Darrel Garretson’s half brother, Seth Collins Jr. the QB for Utah State and points at Gary. Andersen mysteriously disappears during a long 4th quarter, and quits HC position next day citing “I am the wrong f-ing guy.” Garretson takes over HC duties and Seth Collins Jr. comes down with bird flu and “almost dies” in hospital but plays the next week… Utah State goes 3-9 on the year beating Hawaii, Colorado State and BYU.

With the offense in sync, and Tim T’s defense improved, OSU rolls to a 55-13 win and season ticket sales double overnight as OSU announces start date of end of 2019 season for Raising Reser Part III West Side completion. Scott Barnes becomes AD at Nebraska, Pat Casey becomes interim AD at OSU. Raises $19 million on first day…

Stanford

Worst: With newly appointed (by Scott Barnes) interim defensive coordinator Mark Banker at the helm, OSU switches to a 0-10-1 defense. Smith enraged by Barnes’ actions, calls Tim Euhus for advice. Tim tells him to invest in Edward Jones retirement fund… Banker places Elu Aydon and Jordan Whitely at outside LB spots to try and counter Stanfords power run looks. Chaos ensues when Elu recovers fumble only for play to be reversed by newly appointed Pac-12 replay official, Glasses ref. With play clearly botched, Elu quits football for reality TV show. Whitely gets concussed and never plays football again. Colletto scores 2 TD’s but 3 picks. Stanford powers through OSU defense and Addison Gumbs is lost for the year with another torn ACL. Avery Roberts gets suspended for “attitude problems” by Mark Banker and the mutiny begins… Having already lost Matthew Tago to transfer, Jalen Moore joins him and John McCartan follows to Oregon. Mario Cristobal signs Isiah Tufagas brother during early signing period and Jim Leavitt returns to UO mid season after Andy Alvaros leaves for CFL job.

We lose 35-18.

Best: With a surprising move, Jonathan Smith starts with Jack Colletto in the game on first offensive play. With Elu Aydon at fullback, defense expects a run heavy… Colletto steps up and fakes the run, throws to Teagan Quitoriano for a 67 yard TD rumble carrying 3 Stanford defenders to the end zone. Noah Togai scores twice but is lost for the season breaking his arm on a PAT attempt protection. Applies for medical hardship but realizes he had already. Transfers to Utah State to finish degree. Luke Musgrave steps in and catches a TD late and Beavs squeak it out on a Jeffrey Nelson extra point make after Musgrave’s TD.

We win 28-27.

@ UCLA

Worst: Chip Kelly has restored UCLA to prominence and Dennis Dixon Jr. starts at QB after injuries force the true frosh walk on (one week on team) into action. The gamble pays off for Chip as Dixon Jr. passes for 300 yards and runs for another 100 yards and embarrasses Mark Banker’s “defense” AGAIN… UCLA embarrasses OSU and Chip smiles for the first time in 10 years as time runs out… Nick Daschel tweets suspicious “eye glass emoji” face… Danny Moran favorites tweet… Arty is lost for the season on injury and leaves school to prepare for the NFL draft.

We lose 41-17.

Best: OSU cracks the top 25 polls and is featured on College Gameday with their Star Wars pre game routine that is becoming a fan favorite across the nation. The turn over chainsaw is now being used every 10 minutes and the OSU defense leads the nations with 19 turnovers forced in 5 games. 3 against UCLA and it proves dire for the Bruins as OSU escapes the Rose Bowl with a slim victory with Luton throwing 3 picks but Jefferson carrying the offensive load with 202 all purpose yards.

We win ugly 16-12.

Utah

Worst: Kyle Whittingham has the Utes rolling through Corvallis on a Friday night but Avery Roberts says not so fast my friend pre game.

The Utah offense is abysmal for the 10th year in a row and Dennis Erickson stands on the sideline for OSU murmuring the play calls.

OSU offense rises to hold Utah to a 14-14 tie with 3 minutes to go. Zach Moss breaks the OSU defense with a 49 yard run and a fake FG pass TD by an amazing random Australian punter that is Utah’s signature and proves to be the difference. Tristan Gebbia enters his name in the transfer portal. All JC d-lineman decommit on their official visit week.

We lose 21-14.

Best: Fresh off a great defensive performance, and a #20 ranking, Beaver offense says it’s their turn to carry the team… Champ Flemmings has 190 yard receiving and an 90 yard kick off return TD. Adds a short rushing TD on fly sweep to go along with 2 TD catches to total 4 TDs and a program record 618 all purpose yards. Utah keeps it close as Tim Tibesar’s defense shows weakness against Huntley and crew. Whittingham mistakes new AD Pat Casey for Scott Barnes, tries to hug him, Pat flips him off. Everything is caught on camera and Pat is applauded by all fans outside of Utah as everyone is always thinking about what he did when they see Kyle Whittingham.

We win 48-38 to go to 6-0 and a #13 ranking.

@ Cal

Worst: Reeling from a tough defeat in Corvallis to Utah, Mark Banker sees hope for the defense. However, he shows up to practice with a black eye and rumors swirl. Meanwhile, Jonathan Smith’s knuckles are bruised… Nick Daschels routine background check comes back on Jonathan Smith during game-week and reveals that in 2002 after his college career, Niner went to a club to play Fifa with then Chad Johnson (Ocho Cinco) and beat Chad in 13 straight games then went on a drunken stooper with Chad and TJ the day before the Bengals played the Seahawks. TJ and Chad got off scott free as Niner took the blame for the three cars they stole and took to the local demo derby in Cincy while painting cars green and yellow and then proceeding to smash them in the derby. Niner was jailed for two nights and then later bailed out by former teammate Marty Mauer. Nothing was on record as the police thought he was the water boy for Chad and TJ nothing more…

Nick Daschel tries to run with this story and say that Niner encourages bad behavior by college students and then covers it up for the star players by dumping previous players under the bus. Christian Wallace is his main “source.” Wallace quote: “yea coach Smith is a dude who talks dude watchu mean man g, bud, eou, aodfg”

Quote gets plastered on front of SI. Niner gets put on probation by Scott Barnes for three games. Jake Cookus for the second straight year gets promoted to interim head coach. It’s a wreck. Team loses faith and gets pummeled by Cal. Jack Colletto breaks pelvis and Aidan Willard is forced to run the team after being absent for most of fall camp. Offense is now in mutiny mode and Isiah Hodgins announces he is declaring for the draft mid season and will not play in any more games. Tyjon Lindsey stays with it and tweets “that’s my quarterback” TO meme at Willard. Banker retweets.

We lose 29-0.

Best: Niner sees Beau Baldwin pre game and is cordial. Beau says he is a better offensive mind. Niner scoffs.

Tim Tibesar pulls the defense together and says “do this for Niner.” They ensue to suffocate the Cal offense and force 6 turnovers and 2 defensive TDs. Brian Lindgren pulls out a trick play that involves Tyjon Lindsey, Hamiclar Rashed, Elu Aydon, Jefferson and ending with champ running through John McCartan’s legs for a TD. Niner mouths to Lindgren “run it up Brian! Leave no doubt!”

Luton throws 6 TD’s, Niner puts Nick Moore in to spite Beau and the EWU program that once was and he runs in 2 scores and throws another. Postgame, Niner congratulates Beau Baldwin for not coaching at Oregon State, thanks him for pulling offer from incoming QB Ben Gulberson. Casey Filkins sees this interaction and instantly decommits from Cal citing “unimaginative offensive coaching.” Andy Alferi jumps ship and posts pic of Beaver Brat at next home game…

Beavs jump to #6 overall and 7-0. We win 70-10.

@ Arizona

Worst: After Nick Daschels column with Christian Wallace as his star witness, Niner is suspended pending investigation by Scott Barnes.

Jake Cookus quits because of stress and becomes a logging supervisor with Thomas Tyner in Bend. Banker takes over head coaching.

Banker confident after he coached Hawaii defense to win, says he has the perfect plan.

John McCartan spies Kahlil Tate whole game, sacks him three times and recovers two fumbles. Defense proves to not be horrible and limits the cats to 10 points.

Offense does enough even with 4 turnovers and they squeak out a victory and Banker takes the team to In and Out for old times sake. Tristan Gebbia officially leaves team and plans to play for the Winnipeg Blue Bombers that Mike Riley is the current coach at in the CFL. League starts in 2059.

We win 16-10.

Best: Luton to Jesiah Irish. Implant that in your mind. It happens 16 times and Irish goes for 329 yard and 5 TD’s besting the Hawaii WR performance in Week 0. Luton throws 4 picks however and gets pulled for Gebbia who shows amazing poise and leads the team to a grinding victory in the end. Smith reminds the team, “We have to stay grounded. This is built stick by stick. One at a time.” Jalen Moore responds: “We got the sticks coach, BTD!” Casey Filkins and Andy Alferi commit in postgame locker room. Andrew Nemec downplays both and quickly tries to delete previous articles praising the two players… gets called out by Sidd Finch on twitter. Aaron Feld defends Nemec. “He flexed once.”

We win 56-38 and go to 8-0.

Washington

Worst: Coach Pete says Niner is cute pre game. Scott Barnes still investigating, asks Coach Pete for advice. Doesn’t say anything more. The Dogs woof at Reser. Blowout the Beavs. Niner trial pending with NCAA. Mark Banker goes to the top of the Peacock and dances during happy hour. Bruce Read karokes to Ricky Martin.

We lose 56-10.

Best: At 8-0 (5-0 in conference) and Washington at 9-0 (6-0) in conference, GameDay comes to town… Tensions are high as Dawg fans are verbally abusing Niner pre-game still wondering how Jake Browning never improved in the 11 years playing at UW and how Tyrone Willingham was ever the UW coach. Niner doesn’t come out for the whole pre game on field. TV thinks he isn’t at stadium. No players warm up. No one can be found…

Arty emerges from the inflatable Beaver helmet appearing to be levitating but he is really just standing on Champs shoulder who is hidden under Arty’s calves. Coach Pete has a stroke on the sideline in disbelief as the stadium is blacked out… Helicopters can be heard overhead and orange sirens are seen… Elu parachutes from the sky and the captains follow and skydive into the stadium. Jake Cookus takes credit postgame for the plan as he is interviewed for a brilliant onside kick play where Elu throws Champ in the air and he catches the onside kick in mid air and takes a fly sweep 24 yards for the win with zeroes showing on the clock.

Coach Pete recovers at local hospital and Ethan Braught does his insurance paperwork.

We win 28-26. Desmond Howard drinks a cup of real Beaver juice provided by the animal science department at OSU.

Arizona State

Worst: Herm Edwards brings the Devils in with their hair on fire and in a battle for Chad Johnson Jr.’s recommit for the 2020 class.

Pro style offense dooms Bankers’ defense for the first time since 2010 and ASU handles the pathetic offense lead by Willard. Brian Lindgren questions Banker’s true motives postgame. Jordan Whitely asks to play running back or threatens to transfer.

We lose 37-12.

Best: Reser is rocking for the second straight week. A sold out crowd shakes the stadium and the West End collapses during the 4th quarter. Game tied at 24, it is forced to be relocated to Crescent Valley High School’s grass field. Herm Edwards brings Scott Sanders on staff for the 4th quarter. Eno Benjamin breaks an 80 yard run but drops ball before goal line. Glasses ref can’t review because Crescent Valley has no cameras set up. Score counts and proves to be the difference. However, Chad Johnson Jr. begins questioning his commitment…

We lose 38-36.

@ Washington State

Worst: Gage Gabrud throws for 900 yards and 12 TD’s. Banker spends the night in Pullman. Bruce Read is hired on as special teams consultant as Jordan Choukair misses 8 field goal attempts from 35 yards out and 2 extra points. It doesn’t matter.

We lose 96-12. Mike Leach looks for different job as he proclaims postgame, “this is too easy..”

Best: Snow falling in late November and Pullman rocking as this is for the Pac-12 North title. Andrew Nemec writes article pre game about how it’s unbelievable and a miracle that Washington State and Oregon State are a combined 18-2 on the season because they have no 4 or 5 star recruits and are consistently ranked 11th and 12th in the conference in recruiting. He starts questioning if the coaches are evaluating talent correctly.

With momentum and Luton looking to atone for previous injuries against the Cougs, Niner takes the ball out of his hands and the Air Raid and runs 70 running plays. Jefferson runs for 200 and Arty goes for 243. OSU doesn’t punt and WSU has 4 total possessions. Mike Leach hires Navy coach as offensive coordinator and switches to the triple option.

We win 28-7 and clinch the Pac-12 North and head to the Civil War 10-1.

@ Oregon

Worst: Con’s funeral is a success. He was 27 years old.

Beavs end season 2-10. Mark Banker is given lifetime contract to coach at OSU. He accepts. Hires Gary Andersen as his defensive coordinator. Scott Barnes forces Issac Barnes to be walk on QB and gets promised starting position ahead of 2020 season.

Wayne Tinkle receives lifetime contract after he goes 16-16. Promises HUGE 2020 season. Scott Rueck leaves to be the coach at Uconn.

OSU Baseball goes 20-35 and Kevin Abel never plays baseball again. Kerry Eggers retires and moves to Spain. Angie Machado takes over Portland Tribune. John Canzano and Andrew Nemec go on strike for the Oregonian and join Antifa. Celebrated for “tolerance and diversity,” both get hired at Nike. OSU gets dropped by Nike and Scott Barnes signs new contract with K-Swiss. Says “they are one of kind and this will strategically improve our position in all sports. The shoe with the shield.”

Brian Lindgren leaves to be the offensive coordinator at Oregon. Justin Herbet gets medical hardship waiver. Phil swan dives off Reser and is caught by redcoats. Get’s put in insane asylum. Is forced to wear green and yellow jumpsuit to combat his inner demons. Braught becomes house dad at local sorority and gets fired because he refuses to talk to any of the pledges. Con loses job and is forced to work at the Young Life service center in the HR department. JD moves to Texas to work for the Dallas Cowboys as Zekes personal slave. Ash and Payson move in with Lisa and enjoy their time without any men in their lives. Vow to never watch Beaver football again. Scott Barnes becomes new president of Oregon State and eliminates OSU WBB and Baseball citing “funding” issues.

Niner is indicted and claims insanity and is sent to same asylum as Phil. Phil mumurs 430.235 years until competitiveness. Kalani Sitake leads BYU to a Rose Bowl birth but loses to a coachless Utah State team lead by Darrel Garretson. Conor Blount wins FCS Heisman.

Best: Oregon comes in at 0-11 looking for a glimmer of hope to end the season on. Mario Cristoball blames “injuries” for their struggles. Brian Lindgren calls the same trick play as the disastrous Civil War in 2018 as first play of the game and instead Luton throws a 90 yard TD on a throwback to Champ.

Champ has 900 all purpose yards and 4 TD’s. Jefferson and Arty both surpass 1,000 yard rushing on the season and 10 TD’s each. Add 500 yards a piece breaking the threshold with two screen passes that both go for TD’s.

Luton gets carried off the field and joins the 35th and Jackson crew at Taylor’s post game for 9 *uck it buckets. Tells Con and Braught they will be groomsmen in his wedding in 3 months. Doesn’t even invite them to wedding or bachelor parties. Braught gets married to Nike exec. Mario Cristoball gets fired after going 0-12. Oregon hires Don Pellum as head coach. We win the Civil War in dominating fashion, 74-0. Ducks send out walk ons to play second half. Oregon burns their new cheer uniforms. Con laughs.

Dana Altman is arrested for paying players and sentenced to life in prison. Beaver basketball fires Wayne Tinkle and Pat Casey steps in as permanent head coach.

We dominate Utah AGAIN in the Pac-12 championship, get snubbed from CFP but destroy Ohio State in Rosebowl. Arty becomes first player to have 7 80+ yard touchdown runs against one team in his career. Both Arty and Jefferson get invited to Heisman finalist show. Arty wins Heisman but gives it to Jefferson. “He the real MVP.”

Luton gets selected by the Seahawks in the first round and starts in 2020 and leads them to Super Bowl after Russel Wilson retires to become the manager for the new Portland Baseball MLB team.

Niner signs lifetime contract and Bob Lundenberg moves back from Boise and buys the Oregonian with his life savings money that he put down and won on the Beavers winning the Pac-12 championship in Vegas. Hires Kerry Eggers to cover all OSU sports. Donates $100 million to OSU and Pat Casey fundraises the rest of the money and completes Reser Stadium West in 5 months. Earthquake breaks Autzen in two.

Both scenarios are extremely likely to happen. Which one will it be???

 

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Best Case/Worst Case: 2018 Beaver Football Preview

FeaturedBest Case/Worst Case: 2018 Beaver Football Preview

By Con/35th & Jackson

Our annual nod to the Ted Miller. Previously ESPN.

Here we will run our best case/worst case scenario for the 2018 Oregon State Football season. All very real possibilities but extreme in both cases.

PSA: We were not EXTREME enough last year obviously…that is saying something…we will try and take this to another level… for last years, see here: Best/Worst Case 2017

Here’s to 2018.

@ Ohio State:

Worst: It’s a new season, new year, new coach, new everything, or so we thought…

First play in the horseshoe, Arty takes the opening kickoff 94 yards for TD and drops ball at .5 yard line channeling his inner Chad Johnson. Refs review play, take away TD. Arty so disappointed in himself he says sorry to Coach Smith as he is mic’ed up. Coach Smith then punches Arty in the face on camera, Arty is out for the season with fractured jaw. Confused by what he has just done, Niner forgets to call correct play and runs a tight end middle screen at the .5 yard line… Isiah Smalls gets popped by Nick Bosa fumbles, and it gets housed 99.5 yards the other way. Niner gets taken off field by same police that investigated Urban Meyer, so all hope is not lost… Mike Riley is in attendance at the Horseshoe and walks into a decimated locker room at halftime and proclaims: “We are still in this. It’s only 79-0. We still have one half we can win.” Brian Lindgren takes over head coaching duties, Tim Tebesar quits, becomes interim head coach at Ohio State.

We lose 93-3 on a last second field goal by the ghost of Alexis Serna.

Best: It’s a new season, new year, new coach, new everything, and we are who we thought we were…

Niner is juiced pre-game. ESPN video shows him shaking every players hand in locker room and handing them each a small stone. Audience is confused, but players locked in. Smith pulls a slingshot out of his back pocket, “Let’s go slay the giant.”

We start with a steady dose of Arty trying to free up the long game, it pays off. 8th play of game, Timmy streaks free with shades of CSU, no one within 25 yards. 7-0 and the Horseshoe is silent. We trade a few scores, Niner calls a great steady dose of Arty who has 124 yards at half. We lead 17-14 at half. Kenneth Pancake starts salivating at the possible article he will write about the biggest upset in 2018 and that he knows some other writers who predicted it…

THE OSU comes out with fire to start the second half. Scores 28 straight. 42-17. One quarter left… QB throws pick 6 to Kee, he dances in. Beautiful onside kick executed and recovered by Andre Bodden. Jemar Jefferson rips off a 54 yard TD, 13 minutes left, 42-28… Hughes Murray comes up with a HUGE sack on third down, Trevon Bradford houses the ensuing punt. 42-35. But the comeback ends there as THE OSU bleeds the clock and eventually breaks the D’s back.

We lose 49-38.

Southern Utah:

Worst: With Niner suspended and future in question, Lindgren guides the team. Mike Riley is offensive coordinator. Promotes Jake Dukart to starting QB. Runs “pro style.” Everyone is confused, clamors of a Riley takeover are peppering Corvallis. Jake Cookus gets promoted for the second straight year to DC. Different tune this time around, he plays prevent… Southern Utah hangs 48 on us, but we hang 49 on a last second 2 point conversion attempt by Jemar Jefferson, Ice Blast 35… (Sun Bowl 2006)

We win 49-48

Best: Leading up to Southern Utah, the tune is buzzing like a week 1 victory, regardless of the outcome. Kee has game of his life, 3 sacks and a pick 6. Defense dominates, offense running like a well oiled machine, quick passes, slants, screens, occasional deep ball and steady diet of you guessed it, Arty.

We win 55-3.

@ Nevada:

Worst: Lindgren playing ghost during the week. JS gets Urban’s attorney and THE OSU prez recommendation, gets 2 game suspension. Arty has transferred at this point to UO. Mariota center has secret, next gen, 3D bone printer and reconstructs his jaw perfectly and fit for Flex Friday. Arty gets a waiver to play right away because of his abuse. He becomes starter 3rd week as Tony Brooks James has broken back from Bowling Green. Vegas comes around, Lindgren meets up with Mike Leach on vacation, brings WR coach to “gentlemen’s” club. Tristan Gebbia gets out of limo, and straight into a craiglist escort aka a cop. Lindgren gets off scot-free, WR coach fired 5 years later, claims innocence, story to be revisited… Riley coaches game against Nevada, has fun handshake with defender who blasts Jake Luton back into Pullman. Colin Kapernick is shown on jumbo-tron ironically not kneeling as Luton is taken off the field on stretcher. Conor Blount refuses to play again, claims medical redshirt, Dukart is inserted again with Riley at the controls. Nevada pounces. Picks the freshmen off 5 times, routes OSU. Riley goes to In and Out alone. Brings Niner back a double double with animal style with fries. They eat alone in the basement of Gill. Jay John pats them both on the back.

We lose 38-10.

Best: 4-star Isiah Rutherford commits mid-week, says he “feels another stick will be added to the Dam soon.” Andrew Nemec writes headline of “UO pulls scholie of 4-star who has just been downgraded to low 3-star, commits to OSU reluctantly”

New beat writer Nick Daschel zones in the prophetic words of 35th and Jackson. Joins them at pre game HHPR tailgater. Dan Hoff gives Bob Lundeberg job as Chief Beaver Sports writer/Civil Engineer. Roth complains about “fairness.”

The actual game is an afterthought. Nevada still is the same Nevada as 2018. OSU is not. Defense dominates. Offense pounds the rock. Arty goes for 237 and 3 TD’s. Hits 600 yard mark 3 games into season. 7 TDs. JS says it’s too early to tell, but “we have something special here.”

We win 31-3.

Arizona:

Worst: Jesiah Irish gets the official start at receiver. Teagon Quintariano tries to hold his own at TE as Isiah Smalls is out for the season. Kevin Sumlin hatches a plan to get the OSU playmakers out of the game. Goes after Irish third play on a touchdown catch post play. James Rodgers cowers from the sideline. Irish out for season with broken fibula. With Arty, cranking out 200 yard games at UO. Jemar Jefferson gets his chance. Runs for 132 yards but it isn’t enough. Khalil Tate runs for 239, passes for 383. 8 total TD’s. Riley still running the team, leaves for Texas fake NFL job right on schedule. Says it was nice to “fill in for Jonathan.” JS can’t come back quick enough, sitting at 1-3, team in turmoil, his arrival back, even with charges pending against him, is a breath of fresh air.

We lose 59-21.

Best: Team is 2-1, feeling like 10-1. Playing their best football in years. Niner is confident, but trying to keep perspective for still a young team. Timmy Hernandez goes down in a crazy practice drill, Jesiah Irish and Champ must step up. Champ takes a fly sweep 43 yards for the score to take the lead going into half 23-20. Smith reminds the team, “We have to stay grounded. This is built stick by stick. One at a time.” Randomly, Kee puts on a new t shirt under his jersey for second half. D come out with vengeance, Luton throws 3 TD’s, two to Irish. A new combo is brewing. Beavs add another stick to the dam.

We win 37-30.

@ ASU:

Worst: The 35th and Jackson crew cancels their trip to ASU because Andy and Hai are homeless and living out of the side of a burrito food cart. Hai is making some paper though selling out of the back… Elmer Fudge pays a visit, Jay John buys a burrito from the truck. Still coaching with Sean Miller, he kicks back as Tres begins pondering a grad transfer to Arizona basketball…

JS is back at the helm and it is well received. Jemar Jefferson raises JS on his shoulders pre game as he proclaims “you got us here coach.” Herm Edwards tries to motivate his devils on the 118 degree afternoon in Tempe. Beavs come out hot for their new coach, Jefferson running hard. But Blake Brandel goes down on a nasty helmet to knee by Vontaze Burfict’s son. Because of depth and dehydration issues, Elu Aydon is inserted at left tackle. Elu blocks air for the first play, then is gassed, Quin Smith replaces as the makeshift line holds up. Luton is back starting with JS at the helm, throws 4 picks in an ugly game. It’s a battle until the end, but we don’t come out on top.

We lose 13-11.

Best: Arty is being touted as possible first round draft pick. His ability to run and catch sets him apart, with his football IQ making him above and beyond any other RB in the nation. Beavs feed him. Rips off 153 yards, 223 all purpose. Luton throws 2 TD’s on 5 passes. Jack Colletto running the OSU version of QB power, adds 2 TD’s on the ground. ASU keeps it close but Beavs squeak out a victory.

28-24.

WSU:

Worst: Good vibe on this Friday night in Corvallis. Halfway through the year and with a week of stabilization, OSU looks primed for an upset of the #22 Cougars. WSU starting QB gets knocked out first play by helmet to helmet from Jalen Moore. Unfortunately Moore is kicked out for game and next. A walk on QB torches the OSU secondary. But Conor Blount replacing Jake Luton won’t have another loss. He comes out of his fake medical redshirt, throws 4 TD’s, 300 yard second half, similar to another walk on QB. Game ends the same as that one did though, Niner goes for two but the slant to Jesiah Irish is knocked down by Desmond Trufant IV.

We lose 31-30.

Best: Mike Leach proclaims “Ryan Nall is so much better than Arty.”

You can guess what ensues. Arty officially cracks the top 5 Hesiman vote.

Adam Soesman is lost for the season with bruised thigh… go figure.

We win 27-14.

Bye Week:

Worst: JS investigation into punching former RB Arty ends, OSU is fined $5 million. Must ad back the “ad” section of the replay video board with Beaver Blitz advertisements. Oregonian is promised a full section. Dedicates it to “routine” background check information. Pat Casey has a stroke and dies. OSU women’s BB loses Destiny Slocum and Kat Tudor to season ending injuries. Scott Barnes receives community service award.

Best: Isiah Rutherford tweets out “Another stick!” The mystery builds on the recruiting trail. David Morris is cleared to play…

Cal:

Worst: Pre-game Beau Baldwin kisses Scott Barnes hand and says “thank you my savior,” as he smugly walks down the ramp from Gill. Phil yells “Hey Beau, I hate your name!” Cal gets out to a quick lead, their huge white RB having a game. Missed tackles plague defensive unit being coached by Cookus, prevent game is picked apart by the former Bear Raid. Beavs show fight as JS likes to call it, but it isn’t enough.

We lose 45-21.

Best: Fresh off being cleared during the bye week, David Morris has 3 picks, defense leads the charge and shuts out Cal for the first time Beau Baldwin has ever coached in any football game as any coach. Offense does what it needs to, Gus Lavaka retires due to “personal reasons.” JS says post game when asked about amazing defense: “Tim Tibesar is great coach. He just does the things Kevin Clune and Gary Andersen didn’t. Same players, different coach. Thanks guys.”

We win 24-0.

@ Colorado:

Worst: The Buffaloes are coming off a huge win against USC. Ralphie is running and it’s homecoming for Brian Lindgren. He loses it. Tries to get cute. Switches over the the “better quarterback who the coaches were saving all along” in Conor Blount permanently. Jake Luton shuts it down for the season. Blount breaks wrist on zone-read running into Jemar Jefferson’s biceps. Jack Colletto comes in and looks like Braxton Brumiester. That’s bad FYI. Goes 2-17 for 8 yard and 2 picks. Buffaloes silence the momentum that Niner thought he had built with losses…

We lose 29-7.

Best: College GameDay appears in Boulder. Buffaloes are undefeated, Beavs at 6-1, already bowl eligible. Phil holds sign on GameDay: “Ucks Suck” Gets a laugh from Kirk and the boys. Ryan Simmons is the guest picker for GameDay as it started a new tradition of picking someone from a random city and state every week and it happened to be Redmond, Oregon. Simmons declines because he has to play “worship” the next morning. Guest picker ends up being Young Life’s former head of Human Resources. She picks the Buffaloes. Corso asks why. Response: “They are mentally capable. I’m not sure OSU is.”

Niner addresses team with a calmness like no other. Ends with: “FU$$ THIS ELEVATION!” TV station forgets to pre watch recording…

Luton having a solid season already, steals the show. Arty gets concussion in first quarter, knocked out for rest of game. Luton completes passes to 9 different receivers, Champ houses kick return to put the game out of reach late. JS proves he can adapt on the fly with an aerial assault. Isiah Smalls catches his 4th TD of the season, sets ball on top of pile of sticks on sideline. Makes ESPN Sunday morning. Simmons misses clip because of “worship.”

We win 28-19.

USC:

Worst: After a drubbing at Colorado, JS gets put on blast by the same Beaver Blitz crew who praised him. Says he has “lost the team and they aren’t having fun.”

Niner goes on the offensive. Literally. Jack Colletto being so bad that he gets kicked off the team mid game, Niner being a new coach and all thinks the new redshirt rule applied to him in college so he trots out for his 5th year. Throws 4 TD’s, can’t see over the O-Line still and the defense causes a few turnovers. USC can’t play in Corvallis…still! Beavs pull a massive upset, but the NCAA opens investigation into Niner literally playing QB and winning the game. Says it will take a year to resolve if it was legal or not. Niner claims he has been taking meds that make him think he is someone else… Uses same attorney as earlier in the year to fight case.

We win 31-26.

Best: It’s a black out in Corvallis. USC at 7-1. OSU at 7-1. Both coming off big wins respectively. Beavs come out of the tunnel to O-State Ballaz and Jeff Van Orsow and Greg Layborn lead the charge with a 10 foot log signed by each member of the 2007 and 2009 football teams that beat USC. The turns out to be a barn burner. Back and forth we go. Tie ball game heading into half. Niner calls Mike Riley on phone who is at this 4th home in San Antonio preparing for his fake NFL 3 month league… “Mike, I can’t shake these guys!” Response: “Then run ’em over Jonathan!”

The Beavers proceed to run the ball 39 out of 41 plays in the second half, including the last 30 plays straight. Niner turns the game into a grind. Timmy Hernandez out there making crack-black blocks on defensive ends. Clayton York’s cousin leading the way at fullback. OSU goes full jumbo at one point with Elu Aydon and Kalani Vakamaleo at TE’s. David Shaw watches film for pleasure…

We win 27-21.

@ Stanford:

Worst: Stanford doesn’t throw a pass. Runs 92 plays. Elu plays 3 plays. Fans throw their books on the field at Stanford stadium because they are bored. Game mercifully ends. OSU loses OLB commit Omar Speights. Sights “change of heart.” Andrew Nemec tweets about it. Speights upgraded to 5-star prospect. Tosh Lupoi flys to CV game vs CHS…

We lose 31-0.

Best: Power against Power. Billed as the RB show down of the century with Heisman front runner Bryce Love against runner up Artavias Pierce. Both have already eclipsed the 1200 yard mark on the season. Arty with 30 more catches and 3 more TD’s but Love with 300 more rushing yards. Both backs go for 149 but it’s the 149th yard that counts the most for Arty as he punches it in from one yard out on an inside zone behind Elu at full back to win the game in overtime.

We win 35-31 in OT.

@ Washington:

Worst: Sitting at 2-8, Niner tricks the media into believing they can finish 4-8. The sentiment is: “Well if Gary could do it, I can.” Canzano writes article detailing Smith’s involvement in abusing Arty and how Arty has recovered by running for 1539 yard and 30 TD’s for UO in 9 games… Danny Moran provides editing and sourcing for story. Game is an absolute blood bath for Niner and company. Aidan Willard is the starting QB with Matthew Tago as the emergency back-up. Kee Whetzel is lost for the season with broken arm, Isiah Hodgins torn ACL, Jalen Moore pre maturely declares for the NFL draft and Elu out for the year with “exhaustion.” The Beavs are depleted. Matthew Tago comes up with a pick and a sack. Brian Lindgren is seen laughing as he comes out of the press box. Niner says “trust the process and we will live in the hard.”

We lose 59-10.

Best: At 9-1 (7-0 in conference) and Washington at 9-1 (6-1) in conference, it is the first time ever that OSU has a chance to clinch the conference outright before the last game of the season. Tensions are high as Dawg fans are verbally abusing Niner pre-game wondering why Jake Browning never got any better during the 12 years he has played at UW. Niner doesn’t come out whole pre game on field. TV thinks he isn’t at stadium. No players warm up. No one can be found…

Orange smoke rises after the Dawg Pound quiets, an inflatable log seems to be holding the OSU players inside the smoke, Kee Whetzel leads the captains in front, they part like the Red Sea, and there is Niner in the Bobby Bruce Bunny Mask… Words can only show so much of this picture…

Timmy Hernandez scores twice early. Browning is on though…Myles Gaskin takes a screen pass to the house and Luton throws a late first half pick 6. UW leads 21-17 at half. The Dawg Pound trembles… Brian Lindgren needs a play… UW is stuffing Arty at the line so Lindgren dials up the perfect flea flicker and Luton throws a bomb on the pass back to Kolby Taylor streaking down the middle… Browning responds with a 12 play 88 yard TD drive. 28-24 heading into the 4th.

Beavs go three and out to start the 4th, Browning leads UW to another TD drive. Luton has the ball 8 minutes to go, down two scores. Screen pass to Arty and he spins off a defender, gets a blindside block from Trevon Bradford, Luton is leading leading Arty down the sideline like Sunshine in Remember the Titans. Get’s knocked out by UW safety. Arty scores though… Luton out for the game but Beavs only down one score. Defense forces a three and out and punt team takes the field. Beavs run a return reverse to non other then Champ Flemmings who was hidden behind Elu Aydon in the middle of the return team. He houses it for a TD for the Beavs first lead! BUT an offsides penalty by the nose tackle over the ball, gets it called back. 89 seconds to go, Beavs down 35-31 and need a TD. Niner inserts Jack Colletto instead of Conor Blount… Colletto shovel passes to Christian Wallace who then laterals back to Colletto and Colletto scampers for 42 yards to the Washington 5. Niner gets the play in, 6 seconds left. It’s a Timmy Hernandez WildCat Statue of Liberty to Arty and he gets the outside only to be stopped at the 2 by a UW linebacker. Game over. Coach Pete greats Niner at midfield and says: “Not my play against me…”

We lose 35-31.

*Ucks:

Worst: No comment.

We end season 2-10. Brian Lindgren leaves citing “stress issues.” Jake Cookus opens a donut shop in Eugene. Niner says he will stick it out… Now has to find new DC, OC, ST, and WR coach. With a depleted roster, Niner spends the summer working for free as the QB coach at Independence Community College where he runs into Simi Kuli playing D-End. Tristan Gebbia transfers there and gets signed the next year by UO. Smith returns to UW the next year as OC and says “OSU is impossible to resurrect. I have tried twice.” OSU hires Art Bryles. Mixed reactions from fans. Bob Lundeberg gets assigned to cover 2A 8 man football in Baker City. Gina Mizell gets hired as head of team Ideation at Oregon State. Scott Barnes gets contract extension and increases the fan experience committee to 50 people none of which are OSU grades. Cites “diversity.” Andy never comes back from Arizona, the rest of 35th and Jackson loses their jobs and are forced to work as redcoats. Scott Rueck leaves to be the coach at Baylor WBB. Kevin McGiven is hired as head football coach. Bruce Read is special teams consultant.

Best: With a win securing at least a tie for the Pac-12 North title, Niner locks himself and the team in the baseball teams “Omaha” room for 4 days leading up to the Civil War. “This is how champions are made.”

Beavs come out in all black unis for Mario’s funeral and honorary captains for game are Jacquizz Rodgers for OSU and John Boyett for UO. Jacquizz re-invents the bull doze of 2010… Boyett vaporizes into the November air… First play from scrimmage is a Isiah Hodgins slant that goes the distance. Justin Herbert gets knocked around by the Kee and Hamiclar who set the single season record for sacks with 18 each. David Morris picks off Herbert and knees the ball and just points at Mario Cristoballz… Beavs don’t have a third down on offense and Mario asks for Friday Night Tykes mercy rule…

We win 50-0.

UW loses on last second Hail Mary by Ortez Jenkins son at Arizona. Beavs win Pac-12 North outright. Play Utah in the championship. Gary doesn’t show. Neither does the Utah D-Line. Arty runs wild and finishes the regular season with 3429 all purpose yards and 41 total TD’s. Win’s the Heisman over Jake Luton. Niner wins coach of the year nationally and gets offer from Western Michigan. Turns it down. Kennesaw State offers $100 million over 4 years, JS says no. Beavs win Pac-12 championship. Play Wisconsin in Rose Bowl, beat Paul Chryst and the Badgers. Niner smiles and gets high five from his former OC. Beavs play Florida State in National Championship and blank Willie and boys 31-0. Niner says “the civil war ha ha ha ha.” Willie leaves to be the coach back at USF. Scott Frost takes FSU job. Mario Cristobal gets extended for life after a 6-6 season. Jim Leavitt vows to bring the “black shirts back” and accepts the HC job at Nebraska. Half of Cristoballz staff leaves, he wonders why… And finally, Isiah Rutherford tweets out “Dam built!” and simultaneously Michael Johnson Jr. decommits from Penn State and announces his commitment to OSU. States he was a silent commit and that “It just feels like home, it always has.”

Both scenarios are extremely likely to happen. Which one will it be???

Calm Before the Storm: 2018 OSU Football Overview; Fall Camp

FeaturedCalm Before the Storm: 2018 OSU Football Overview; Fall Camp

By Con

Fall camp is upon us. The weather is turning already, thanks Oregon…I walked into work today with a morning mist on my face and a breeze in the air. The time has come. The Return.

This will be some quick comments and overview of each position group and key players to watch out for. Let us know your thoughts and what you are looking out for or want us to report on more.

Offense: We will be watching the  creativity and play calling closely. Coaches are preaching: “we will do what fits our personnel.” However, we don’t know and I don’t know if the coaches know what that means yet. With questions on our o-line, will OSU be able to run the ball? Protect the passer? It all starts up front. A good o-line can hide a lot of other issues and make everyone better. However, it can go the other way just as easily with a bad one.

QB: Our pick to start is Jake Luton, but end of the year Conor Blount. I don’t see JS being afraid to yank a guy after a few games or mid game. Despite what other reporters say, Luton is NOT a statue behind the line. He can scramble a bit. Not like Blount but he isn’t inept. Will be interesting how much read option game OSU really runs. See JS at UW…basically ran a fake read option with Jake Browning for the past three years and Browning maybe kept the ball 5 times a year and still produced. Luton could be in that same mold. Blount seems to be a gamer and a gun slinger. Luton safer pick but Blount could be the playmaker and leader the offense needs.

Grade: C

RB: Arty has this locked up and for good reason. Seems like a stouter Yvenson Benard. Look for him to have a big year and many touches out of the backfield and carries. JS has also mentioned Calvin Tyler consistently as someone to look out for. Kick returns, third downs Tyler could showcase. Chrisitian Wallace wildcat package. Mark my words.

Grade: A-

WR: Timmy, Trevon and Hodgins look like locks to start. Kolby Taylor will be a regular guy and can go over the middle and take a hit. Has been mentioned by JS many times. Champ Flemmings will be used in different packages, Tino Allen on kick returns and punts. Walk on Andre Bodden is a stud and big time special teams contributor who could get some time. Mentioned by coaches a handful of times. Need a QB to get these guys the ball on time and in the right place. Watch out if that happens…

Grade: B

TE: Help us. Togai returns but is crazy overrated. Can’t stay on the field with injuries and has not proven to be consistent at all. He gets the praise because it has been years since OSU has had a solid tight end for multiple years. Quin Smith could make an impact here as a reliable, Colby Prince type option. JS commented how much OSU just needs bodies at this position. Isiah Smalls will have the opportunity, see if he takes it.

Grade: C-

OL: So many question marks and yes experienced players but not Pac-12 caliber proven! Blake Brandel will be a stud, but one great OL hardly can carry a Power 5 O-line. Center position is wide open. Lavaka way out of shape, hopefully Jim M. can work his magic. Look for #65 Onesimus Clarke to grab a spot. He was promising as a redshirt, has gotten in shape and has some stuff. Jim M. is high on Hawaii transfer Kipper, but he must sit out. #55 Keli’i Montibon JC transfer last year was praised. Looks to be in great shape and athletic.

Grade: D

Special Teams Return/Kicker: 

Jordan Choukair should be an honorable mention all Pac-12 player. Tino Allen, Trevon Bradford, Calvin Tyler, Christian Wallace, Champ Flemmings all in the mix for return touches. Look for Calvin Tyler on kickoffs as primary option. Coverage on kickoffs should be interesting with the new redshirt rule. I want Matthew Tago running down as wedge buster. Our boy Kee will be on it no doubt. Andre Bodden, Trajon Cotton, Omar Hicks-Onu, Jordan Gregory, DeShon Wilson are some names to watch on kick coverage.

Grade: B+

Defense: Tim T. seems like a guy with a plan to get FAST guys on the field. Sideline to sideline coverage has been a GLARING issue for OSU since 2007 defense led by Derrick Doggett, Joey LaRouqe and Alan Darlin at LB’s that carried OSU. Key will be to make this defense simple. Players connected to PNW Sports Fans harped for years how Mark Banker had more than 2,000 plays in the defensive playbook, Kalani Sitake wasn’t organized and Kevin Clune refused to send blitz packages or trust guys to make plays. The common theme with every coach according to players was too complex of systems where guys didn’t know the right plays or places to be and were too concerned with learning them instead of playing free, fast and fiery. Will be interesting to see the pressure Tim T. cooks up for QB’s. I think the last time OSU landed a real sack on first contact and solid hit was back when Robo Duck existed down south…

DL: ELU HOW DO YOU WEIGH 380 POUNDS??? MORE THAN 40 POUNDS FROM 2017??? DIDNT KNOW HUMAN LET ALONE A D1 FOOTBALL PLAYER COULD ACHIEVE THAT AND STILL MOVE.

On a real note, Kalani V. seems to have one DL position locked down and JC transfer Jeromy R. another. Walk on, RS Frosh Jalean Bush will make an impact ala Slade Norris in 2007. He can get off the edge, is long and can hold his own physically. Other then those 3 guys, so many unproven, D-1 questionable guys. I am sure Tim T. knows this could be an issue and will play MANY 2 down lineman packages.

Grade: D-

LB: Looks to be athletically in good shape here. Shemar Smith, Doug T. and Jonathan Willis will man the inside positions. Willis must show leadership here or he will get pulled out. Matthew Tago might be candidate inside or outside. Emony Robinson could contribute on special teams or in rotation.

Kee Whetzel will anchor us outside. He is fast, strong and sideline to sideline cover. Brings the juice and dance on top of that. He will be a candidate for All Pac-12 award if OSU turns in a solid defensive year. Hamiclar Rashed will not be far behind. He is a little bigger then Whetzel but brings it. Look for him and Kee to be dancing in some backfields this year. Bring back the pat down please. Andrzej Hughes-Murray will get plenty of time. True frosh John McCartan and Isiah Tufaga could get some looks. Both have been mentioned by coaches as body ready for this season. Look for nickel packages to be brought in a lot to get best defensive guys on the field at a much deeper position at DB.

Grade: B

DB: Even with the loss of Xavier Crawford, OSU looks to be in decent shape at DB. David Morris, Jalen Moore, Omar Hicks-Onu, Jeffrey Manning are great candidates at safety and nickle positions. Morris should have strong year and Jalen Moore could get some great attention heading into his senior year next year. At corner, Dwayne Williams when healthy is a great option, Shawn Wilson, undersized but a fighter, Jay Irvine could be big. PNW has their eye on two guys that could be great corners for OSU for a long time… Isiah Dunn and frosh DeShon Wilson. Dunn has GREAT instincts and sticks guys right after the catch and in space. Fights well with his hands and has good size. DeShon Wilson has brought the stuff from Day 1 of spring ball. He is a true freshmen with a senior’s body. Has the size and speed to be a great corner for OSU. Would have probably played regardless of new redshirt rule this year. We will be watching both those guys closely not just on defense but for years to come as team guys and leaders.

Grade: B-

Special Teams Punting/Coverage

Alex Bland our would be starting punter just left school. That leaves walk on Daniel Rodreguiz as likely starter. DO NOT OVERLOOK THIS POSITION. Remember when the ghost of Kyle Loomis haunted OSU punting for three straight years until Johnny Hekker saved us? Alexis Serna god bless his soul, tried but was put in a bad spot and it HURT OSU and caused so many field position battles to be lost and put defense in bad spots. OSU cannot afford that this year if they want to be competitive.

Coverage looks to be solid with Andre Bodden, Jalen Moore, Matthew Tago, Shemar Smith, Drew Kell, Jaydon Grant and Justin Gardner some names to look out for on punts. OSU has always been solid in their coverage game with some big hitters and limiting returns on punts and kicks.

Grade: C+

Coaching will be the difference instantly if OSU is competitive this year. With virtually the same roster and arguably and uptick in effort based on who is starting, it will be a good gage to evaluate this coaching staff. Do players quit? Give up in games? Play one half? Do coaches drop unknown F-Bombs in their last press conference as a head coach? YEAH LOOK IT UP GARY ANDERSEN POST GAME VS USC WHEN HE TALKS ABOUT MISSED FIELD GOALS…

Should be an interesting year. Go Beavs.